10.        Mountain Equipment Co-op multi-layer gore-tex all-weather parka/rainshell with detachable hood in teal and fuschia with a zippered periwinkle terry-fleece inner liner. (You're going to get torn and filthy. This is a fossil hunt not a trendy outdoor fashion show.)

9.         Brand new 4-wheel drive all-terrain off-road sport-utility vehicle. (Yuppies don't like getting the tires dirty plus all that dust can scratch the paint and lower the resale value.)

8.       Hand-held satellite telemetry global positioning system orienteering unit. (If you can't find the site by reading a road map you've got serious trouble and probably shouldn't be out there.)

7.        Fully loaded picnic basket with matching china, cutlery, crystal glasses, and a bottle of wine. (Are you here to hunt or eat?)

6.        Letter of permission signed by the quarry owner to show the quarry manager on the weekend so he'll let you in. (Quarry managers don't...)

5.        Your partner/friend/kid who has absolutely no interest in fossils. ("We've been here almost half an hour, can we go to the mall now?")

4.        A full stomach. (Hint- There=s no AMens/ladies Room@ signs at a road-cut.)

3.        Expensive camera. (Plastic and glass makes a sickening sound when it shatters against a rock.)

2.        Your 14 karat gold plated, Geological Survey of Canada commemorative limited edition Estwing geologists pick-hammer. (Never bring what you can't afford to lose.)

1.        Your hopes. ("Because you can never find a decent @#$%&* thing!")

Robert Sensenstein